How to Co-Parent With Someone Who Makes Everything Hard

Co-parenting with a high-conflict ex can feel like walking on eggshells. You may dread every drop-off, text message, or custody handoff, not because of your child, but because of the emotional toll that comes with the other parent.

If you constantly defend yourself, overexplain, or feel emotionally drained after every interaction, it’s not just “co-parenting stress.” It might be time to explore new boundaries, and therapy can help.

What High-Conflict Co-Parenting Can Look Like

• Constant blame, gaslighting, or manipulation

• Passive-aggressive texts or “emergency” emails

• Refusing to follow agreements or undermining parenting choices

• Using the child as a messenger, spy, or emotional pawn

• Creating confusion or chaos around schedules

• Making you feel like the “bad guy,” no matter what you do

These patterns don’t just wear you down; they can affect your ability to parent with clarity, patience, and calm.

How This Affects You and Your Child

Even when you try to stay calm, high-conflict co-parenting can lead to:

• Chronic stress and emotional burnout

• Anxiety, self-doubt, or hypervigilance

• Guilt about how your child is being impacted

• Feeling like you have to “prove” you’re the better parent

• Difficulty trusting your instincts or communicating clearly

You’re doing your best. That doesn’t mean you have to do it alone.

What Therapy Can Offer Co-Parents

You don’t need to change your ex. You need tools to protect your peace and model resilience for your child.

In therapy, you can:

• Learn how to respond (not react) to triggering behavior

• Set boundaries without guilt or fear

• Practice parallel parenting when true collaboration isn’t possible

• Build coping skills for moments of overwhelm

• Reconnect with your confidence, values, and long-term vision

You’re allowed to create stability for yourself, even if your co-parent won’t.

Work With Jennifer Anyaugo, RMHCI

Jennifer helps moms and co-parents who feel stuck in stressful parenting dynamics. She provides a calm, empowering space to help you stay grounded and emotionally present, despite the drama. If you’re ready to build a healthier co-parenting system (with or without your ex’s cooperation), Jennifer offers virtual therapy across Florida.

You Don’t Have to Keep Losing Your Peace to Keep the Peace.

Therapy can help you hold your boundaries, protect your child, and stay rooted in who you want to be.

Book a consultation with Jennifer today.